A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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