we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
