You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
