I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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