We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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