He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
