So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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