I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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