I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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