Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(917): View more from New York City

SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(917): SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion. http://tfl.nu/nlg6

Replies (4) Good night (2628) Bad night (612)
Favorite
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(717): She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even http://tfl.nu/tali

Replies (14) Good night (3223) Bad night (1367)
Favorite
(707): View more from California

He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(707): He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/ve7z

Replies (21) Good night (7329) Bad night (1105)
Favorite
(+61): View more from Australia

She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+61): She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental? http://tfl.nu/sd8n

Replies (21) Good night (1372) Bad night (2660)
Favorite
(972): View more from Texas

Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(972): Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life. http://tfl.nu/6m4u

Replies (11) Good night (2389) Bad night (754)
Favorite
(775): View more from Nevada

They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.

(1-775): View more from Nevada

I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(775): They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy. (1-775): I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere. http://tfl.nu/3byv

Replies (6) Good night (2221) Bad night (558)
Favorite
(908): View more from New Jersey

Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(908): Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka? http://tfl.nu/zznq

Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (368)
Favorite
(316): View more from Kansas

Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(316): Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple. http://tfl.nu/0ujo

Replies (24) Good night (519) Bad night (1669)
Favorite
(315): View more from New York

Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(315): Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check http://tfl.nu/umxm

Replies (7) Good night (869) Bad night (414)
Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ? http://tfl.nu/41ep

Replies (7) Good night (983) Bad night (777)
Favorite
(954): View more from Florida

I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(954): I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window http://tfl.nu/x5q3

Replies (4) Good night (861) Bad night (374)
Favorite
(865): View more from Tennessee

You are my mentor.

(276): View more from Virginia

I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(865): You are my mentor. (276): I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement. http://tfl.nu/qxu9

Replies (4) Good night (1216) Bad night (357)
Favorite
(573): View more from Missouri

You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(573): You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night. http://tfl.nu/alam

Replies (6) Good night (1231) Bad night (428)
Favorite
(860): View more from Connecticut

Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(860): Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on. http://tfl.nu/xowf

Replies (9) Good night (803) Bad night (249)
Favorite
(425): View more from Washington

Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal

(425): View more from Washington

Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(425): Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal (425): Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens. http://tfl.nu/rxfs

Replies (0) Good night (538) Bad night (206)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: