i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
