____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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