Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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