She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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