where does the pee come out of this thing
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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