he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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