Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
