No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
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