Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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