She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
