Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
