does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Randomize