You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
