Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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