Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
