just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize