Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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