My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
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He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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