Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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