Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
