I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
drinking out of a sandbucket again
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
