i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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