Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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