i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
