Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
what day is it and did you see me today?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
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