Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
