I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
