Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
