either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
