Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize