no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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