chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
