I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
The best revenge is premature balding
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
