hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
