just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
tonight lets celebrate not being married
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize