It's Friday. Sex?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
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