Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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