she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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