I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
