Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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